Interview With A Vampire... Oops! I mean "Home Schooler!"

What do public schoolers think of home schoolers:

They are weird

They are socially inept

I would not want to hang out with them

I would NEVER do THAT to my children!

And yet, some people choose to do that for their children. Why?

In America there are lots lots of different ways you can be raised, but two of the most famous are home schooling and public schooling. I wanted people to know more about home schooling, and there are a LOT of different opinions on it, so I figured the best way to gain a little insight would be to interview some home schoolers and some public schoolers and find out what they think of themselves and how they were raised.

However that can be a big topic, so I split it in two: Home schoolers first.

Tyler, the man I interviewed (on camera, but that did not turn out so I blogged it.) is a student at George Fox University. Here is what he had to say.

Alexandra: Why did you or your parents choose homeschooling over public schooling?

Tyler: Originally we chose home schooling because there weren't any public schools, I mean I started home schooling when I was 5! And as I grew up it was more like "There isn't any good option." We ended up moving to a town where the high schools were really kind of gang based and it came to the point where, really, if I'd have gone to a public high school I probably would have gotten shot! That sort of thing! Um, at first it was more like my parents wanted to raise me in the church, but as time went on it was like I didn't feel comfortable with the public high schools.

Alexandra: Do you feel like you've gained anything being home schooled over going to public school?

Tyler: There is definitely a lot more individual attention. I get to do more things that I want to do. Like I got to do fencing for four years, which you don't see in most public high schools.

Alexandra: Not a popular sport.

Tyler: No! And people always ask me: "Oh, you're home schooled, you must not have any friends." No, I actually have quite a few friends because I got to go out and do things that were social that you might not otherwise think of, you know?

Alexandra: Do you feel like you have lost anything by being home schooled?

Tyler: The first dance I have ever been to was here at George Fox! Yeah, but other than that I don't feel like I've lost anything... that I would miss anyway.

Alexandra: What do you think of the rumor that home schoolers are socially inept, and cannot function in social settings?

Tyler: I'm on camera aren't I? {laughs} No, but I think that the rumor that home schoolers are being socially ostracized is total... bull, if I may say.

Alexandra: You may.

Tyler: I have a lot of home schooled friends and a lot of public schooled friends and I am able to interact with them just fine. Granted, there are really... "weird" home schooled kids. I am not going to say that they don't exist, but we're not as weird as people may think.

Alexandra: So describe how home schooling can go really wrong.

Tyler: A friend of mine comes to mind... Um, I mean I love this guy to death but he was raisedin a very sheltered household... didn't have a whole lot of friends and was just kind of a mama's boy, like all his life, like even now! I mean he is my age! I feel like there is a point where there can be too much sheltering, and when they're thrust into college they don't really know what to do with themselves. I have definitely seen it gone wrong, in that case at least. So its good to find a nice balance.

Alexandra: Some people think that home schooling is literally where a mom writes 1 + 1 = 2 on a chalk board. (Tyler begins to shake his head) How did you home school?

Tyler: I had a little bit of everything when I was home schooled. In Kindergarten-1st Grade my mom had Hooked On Phonics. Sesame Street was a big one, loved Sesame Street. But then we tried different curriculums where you could order books. My mom would give me a list of things to do, "Ok here is what you need to do this week." and I would get it done and turn it back into her. For high school we did a charter school. They would send me assignments and I would keep hours of what I did so I could get high school credits. So we have tried a little bit of the whole gamut.

Alexandra: For some home schoolers its difficult to get into college because some colleges don't recognize home school credits. Did you run into any of these sort of problems trying to get into George Fox?

Tyler: Yes and No. We realized early on that a lot of my high school credits would be interesting to figure out which is why we chose a charter school. Which means I studied at home but I had a curriculum which meant that I could still get accredited for high school hours. Then what ended up happening was I took the High School Proficiency Exam my Sophomore year so technically I graduated that year and started taking community college classes which I guess is where I stopped home schooling... kind of... but then I was able to get college credit and that's one of the biggest benefits of home schooling is that you're actually able to go and do that.

Alexandra: Do you think graduating early is easier/more of an option when you're home schooled?

Tyler: I think its easer to graduate early when you're home schooled; a lot of my friends did it just because it got to the point where our mom's can't teach us everything and we need to actually go and go to a professor, which is where public school is great. But all of my friends who are freshmen this year are like "Oh I hate this, this is just like a repeat of high school." But I am like "No, I love this!" But I think it is easier to graduate early when you're home schooled. It is an interesting experience though. I mean I was 16 going to community college, I had my own car, my job, I had a month where I lived off noodles. You definitely learn to grow up a little bit faster. I mean you're in a class with all 20-something-year-olds! And there was a guy even that I tutored who was 50! And I was 16-17 years old and I was like "Ok, this is a little weird! What am I doing here?" But in the long run I think it made for an easier transition into "real college." The benefit of doing community college is that I got all my General Education credits out of the way and now all I am doing the stuff in my major and I love it!

Alexandra: Was there any point when you got to college where you felt like "I already know this. I am too smart for this."

Tyler: Um... There have been a couple times, especially the first week of school, where they're telling you "Here is what its like to be independent. Here is where you go and buy food." and I'm like "Well I've already been independent for about two years now." So that was a little bit stupid in my opinion but that is just because of where I am coming from.

Alexandra: Was there any point when you got to college and felt lime "Oh my goodness I was not prepared for this!"

Tyler: Cafeteria eating. Living on a floor with 25 other guys, that was weird. As a home schooler I was always used to having my own bathroom! That was kind of a switch. But the cool thing about being at a nice private school is that it doesn't bother you as much, or at least makes the transition a little easier. Anything else I wasn't prepared about... I wasn't prepared for there to be a lot of people in a small space. I mean you get used to it; its a small school, but like Play Fair (The customary gathering of Freshmen during orientation) scared the crap out of me! There were tons of people in a small area and I'm like "Uuuhhhh... What's going on???" I mean I love people, that is just a little ridiculous! But other than that no. I feel like going from community college to "real" college was a nice and easy transition.

Alexandra: Was there anything you encountered at school that was like "Oh the horrors of the REAL world!"?

Tyler: There really wasn't anything that shocked me. I mean going to community college before this definitely helped 'cause the difference between community college and "real" college is here there is still sort of that clique mentality where everyone is just trying to fit in. Community college you all know you're losers. I learned so much about the "real world" in community college.

The end. :) Public School kid to come next!

This Is Why Your Relationships Fail (Male version)

Men all want to know how to avoid the girl who grow up to be evil-hag women, who nag and complain while systematically emasculating you.

Here is a fool-proof... well... not FOOL-proof, more like you-can-do-it-if-you-have-self-control... but anyway; here is a plan to avoid the aforementioned hag:

Do not date an insecure woman! I know that for the most part American men are raised to want to fix things. (Not in the mechanical sense, although that does happen.) But you go to a young American guy with a problem he'll want to give you the answer. So when an American man sees an American girl with a self-esteem problem he wants to make her see herself the way he sees her. Sounds fine and dandy, right? But no.

Men listen well: AMERICAN GIRLS DO NOT WANT SOMEONE TO FIX THEM, THEY WANT SOMEONE WHO LOVES THEM JUST THE WAY THEY ARE. They do not want your simple solutions, or your fact-based logic.

Unfortunately, secure men already know this, (for the most part) the only men infatuated with insecure girls are insecure guys.

So here is the story,
Not-Man-Enough Tom meets Not-Woman-Enough Sue. Tom sees that Sue sees herself as fat, ugly, and annoying and Tom sets out to show her that she is perfect, beautiful, and interesting. Sue, sure that no other man will feel they way about her that Tom does, immediately is attracted. They begin to date. Sue can tell that Tom doesn't like how down she is about herself and takes it personally. Tom can feel that Sue is distancing herself and takes it personally. Sue thinks Tom spends too much time trying to fix her and not enough time telling her she is pretty. Tom think Sue is nice but is always hiding when her feelings are hurt and constantly making a big deal out of problems he did not even know were there. He is tired of her calling him crying, all.the.time. Tom has to do what he realizes he kind of always knew he would have to do from the start of the relationship, and that is break up with Sue. Tom feels like a jerk for dragging Sue through a relationship that just hurt her more. They have been dating for so long that Sue's self-esteem is now tied into Tom and she thinks she can't function without him. She calls him. She calls his friends. She dates his friends. Tom can't get away. She tries to make him jealous, guilty, happy, miss her, think of her. NOW she wants his help. She wants anything he'll give her.

So Tom can either A) avoid Sue until she finds another boyfriend to drain, B) feel sympathy for the girl he loved and get back together and do the whole thing over again a month later, C) abuse the relationship for the physical aspect and smush Sue's little heart into the floor, or D) ignore/refuse to see where the relationship is wrong and marry Sue.

Now Sue has popped out a few kids and feels less pretty. She starts gaining weight due to depression and does nothing but wear sweat pants and yell at her kids and yell at Tom. She does not care about looking nice anymore because "Tom should not just be attracted to the outside, he should like who I am inside!!" and now Tom would rather stay at work all day than go home to his loud ogre wife and fat bratty kids.

Either way, at the end Not-Man-Enough-Tom is now Less-Man-Enough-Tom and Not-Woman-Enough-Sue is not Less-Woman-Enough-Sue.

Sure, she should not be being so selfish and doing everything to get focus on her, but you also need to know the man you are so you're brave enough to face your wife/girlfriend when she is not feeling her best.

So you're wondering, how do I avoid needy, whiny, stalk-you-forever, naggy, Sue? That is easy. Do not be insecure. Find out who you are, and the great person God has made you. Realize that He does not make mistakes and that He is in charge of your future, and He says not to worry about it. (And if God says not to worry about it, do not worry about it. HE'S GOT YOUR BACK.) When you realize who you are you will not be entertained by girls parade their insecurity as a man-trap for you to fall into.

See that is the thing. It takes self-control. You can't date the first cute Sue that smiles at you just because you're tiredof being alone. You have to get to know her personally, in a group setting, who she is when things are going bad. And when you realize its wrong, you have to distance yourself. Familiar is comfortable. If you know its wrong, and you stick around it you'll convince yourself that what you want is ok. You'll date Sue, because she makes you happy and when you're not with her you're alone. Bored. Thinking about her. (Just what she wants btw) You're hooked and the only way to get unhooked is cold turkey. (Sue will not like this and she'll text you, call you, talk to you, FaceBook you. Anything to get your interest back on her. But remember, she doesn't like you, you're wrong for her. She likes your attention and she doesn't want to mess up her "one shot at true love" just because she doesn't love everything about you at first.)

So this should help,
-Alexandra

PS: If you're insecure, every girl will seem wrong to you in someway. You need to work on you before you try and give yourself to someone else. Dating because you do not want to be alone is selfish and when the relationship fails you'll feel worse than you did when you were alone, because now you're alone and you're a selfish jerk. Who wants to date you? Nobody. So make yourself who you want to be first and then find the girl that fits.

"We don't know what we're doing... let's do it again. We're just amateur lovers with amateur friends." -Amateur Lovers by Switchfoot.